You are hereTUF 15 Live: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly...
TUF 15 Live: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly...
This week's writeup brought to you by a concoction of various cold and flu medicines. I'm feeling like I was hit by a garbage truck then peed on by a wayward alcoholic raccoon. Last night I turned in early and tried to sleep it off. That didn't work so well. So I bucked up, took some medicine and watched the show this morning. If the article sucks, it's not my fault. It's the AIDS I seem to have contracted.
Hey fools, it's Saturday and this week that means it's time for my thrilling recap and review on TV's hottest combat sports reality show, The Ultimate Fighter. Yeah, I know, the show was actually on last night, but I literally just explained why this isn't up until today.
Read all about it after the jump
Anyways, the show started with a little montage of last week's fight and the post fight reaction from the two fighters and their teams. Urijah praises the effort Cristiano Marcello put forth and Cristiano mentions that his primary function in the house will be teaching his teammates (and that's what he's best at anyways).
Then a bunch of the bros in the house talk about being homesick. The British dude from Urijah's team is reading his roommates some sappy love letter he's writing home. It made me lol a little bit, but that could also be the cold medicine. I'm not entirely sure.
Al Iaquinta then talks about how he was supposed to be on season 12 but broke his hand before the show so he couldn't go. Then they talk some gamplanning and what not with him. Urijah mentions that he's concerned that Miles Jury will emulate one of his coach Dominic Cruz's broing lay and pray gameplans. Then he calls Dominic the Decisionator.
The Urijah is at the house with a "life coach" who he mentions also works with Alpha Male. Chris Tickle on Cruz's team thinks it's stupid.
Then Team Cruz's Mike Rio is whining about his knee, who he hurt by landing awkwardly after being dropped by a spinning backfist from Miles Jury during training. Then they show him struggling in training, despite his claims that the knee won't be a problem.
Amazingly enough, Miles Jury was supposed to be on season 13, but injured his knee and couldn't be on the show much like his opponent Iaquinta. Some dude talks about how this fight is like the comeback kids.
Then there is the weigh in and both dudes comfortably make weight and then it's time for the fight.
The fight itself is a relatively boring affair where two dudes who have no pop throw arm punches and sloppy kicks at each other. The only big moment of the fight is when Jury managed to hurt Iaquinta a little bit and then, like an idiot, ran in for a jumping knee and got caught with an overhand right, which seemingly, is the only punch that Iaquinta actually knows how to throw.
Iaqunita wins a split decision after a third boring round is called for.
Then next week's matchup is announced. It's going to be Team Faber's Mike Chiesa (who looks like the white people's version of Jesus) vs. Team Cruz's Jeremy Larsen (who looks like every Afflction wearing duche in the world)
They go all agro forehead to forehead in their stare down and we go to credits...
• The lack of stupid teenage girl drama seems to be a common running theme through this season. Me rikey. Live week to week shows isn't letting them get to edit enough to play up the drama.
• Brittney Palmer!
• Dana was clearly unimpressed by the fight. It made me laugh a little to myself. He knows that those two dudes would be murdered by just about every current 55er in the UFC (and probably a bunch in any other organization)
• Cristiano Marcello going to a coaching role is going to mean nothing but good things for Team Faber. He isn't much of a fighter, but dude knows the game. And he's not a total clown like Urijah.
• The ad campaign for the Bones/Rashad fight. They're going with a unique stategy this time, displaying more of the mental side of fighting as opposed to pure hype.
• Wrestlemania is tomorrow night. I'm going to watch the shit out of it.
• Miles Jury and Al Iaqunita. If these guys are two of the better unsigned 55ers in the world, then I pray for the future of mixed martial arts. Seriously. I think Smith could take either of them. With ease. And he's not even a fighter.
• Only two short clips of Brittney. Boo the UFC for that. The should make the show 45 minutes of glamour shots of Britt and 15 minutes of fighting, It would be the best television show ever.
• Jesus, Urijah Faber really is a himbo. There is literally nothing going on between his ears. I never thought anybody could be that much or a bro, but fuck, he takes the cake for supreme douchiness.
• Dominic Cruz isn't much better than Urijah Faber. He isn't quite as much of a bro, as he seems like he might actually have three or four brain cells, but he's still pretty douchey.
• The phony beef these two coaches supposedly have. It's so forced it makes my stomach turn. Just because Rashad and Rampage successfully made the world think they hated each other and it led to big ratings and buyrates doesn't mean it's going to work with everybody. Those two had chrisma by the pound and this year's coaches, well, don't. At all. So please, UFC, stop. Focus on the dudes who are, you know, fighting this season instead of broing it up all over the place with life coaches and other assorted bullshit.
• The fact that I have done a little reading about the reaction to last night's show and I have noticed people declaring the fight epic. It wasn't. It was sloppy, technically abysmal and amateurish. Seriously, I have seen fights that are light years better than that bullshit last night. At ammy shows in Ohio. Leonard Garcia is more technically proficient than either Jury or Iaquinta. Leonard Garcia. The fact that people actually liked it makes me fear for the future of mixed martial arts. Seriously.
• My neon yellow and green boogers. Something is seriously wrong with me. I'm pretty sure I may be dying.
• I lost like 10 lbs in a couple days. Not the good way. I'm sweating out nasty amounts of fluid and it's very unsexy. Again, I'm pretty sure I'm dying.
• Racing season starts tonight out at Mercer Raceway Park. And I'm not going to be there, because I am dying. I'm fiending some racing and all, but Iknow if I go ut ther and sit in the cold ass weather I'm going to fell a million times worse, or I might actually die or something. Oh well, PPMS opens up for the season next Saturday, my racing season will start there too. Unless I die. That would suck.
And that's all she wrote for this week. See ya next week.